Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes
Author
Frances Shani Parker
Publisher
Loving Healing Press
2 Review Copies Left
All of us are entitled to the rewards of a peaceful, pain-free death. This book honors that with true stories about hospice patients and inspiring insights from the author. Becoming Dead Right guides us through the general and "how to" information maze that prepares us for dealing with death. Improving and expanding hospice services will require systemic changes in healthcare institutions, outreach to diverse populations, and funding. With the inclusion of hospice programs in nursing homes, dying with dignity becomes even more important. Millions of aging baby boomers heighten the urgency for better hospice care and conditions in nursing homes.
Reviews
Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice
Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes
Author: Frances Shani Parker
Publisher: Loving Healing Press
ISBN: 978-1932690354
Frances Shani Parker has woven a beautiful and touching tapestry of life and death; sharing her stories and poems about the very memorable and wonderful patients she worked with as a hospice volunteer. Already extremely busy as a principal, the author decided to learn about becoming a hospice volunteer. Following the workshops, she began her volunteer stint working with patients in urban nursing homes. She chose to visit patients in nursing homes because she believed they were probably less likely to have family and other visitors, and may be in need of outside companionship . Most of her patients were African America, but of course she had some patients of other ethnic groups also.
By sharing her experiences as a hospice volunteer, she allows her readers to take a look inside a situation most of us know nothing about. Through these stories, we learn about the individual patients she works with, along with gaining a much more thorough understanding of the entire hospice system and philosophy. Dying with dignity and peacefullness is something that we all deserve. Hospice care is an important part of ensuring that many people can experience death this way. Numerous races, ages, religious and spiritual beliefs, and life experiences are illustrated here. The process of dying is something that we, as a society, tend to ignore or leave undiscussed. The role of an individual's life experiences, mindset, ability to communicate and religious beliefs all play a huge part in how they interpret the process of death. Ms. Parker has included poetry along with short stories to share her impressions of her patients. In every instance, she found herself learning more about life, and by sharing these lessons we can learn them too.
The book does a great service by bringing the details of hospice to the general reader. We learn how the hospice system can fit into the healthcare system (or lack thereof) in our country today. The final portion of the book is a "tour" of what could be described as the epitome of the place that we all wish we could utilize for ourselves or family members as we/they face the end of life on earth. With the aging of the baby boomer segment of our population, the needs of Americans from the hospice care system becomes greater and greater.
These stories are offered with love and respect by the author to each reader, and you feel that caring and warmth that she offered to each patient she worked with. I will remember many of the stories and the patients they illustrate for some time to come. It's both touching and thought-provoking, and would be a book appreciated at many different levels by all readers. Exceptional ! !
Reviewed on 03/14/2010 by ReviewTheBook.com Member LAURI COATES
WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU PUT TOGETHER A VOLUNTEER, A NURSING HOME, AND A TRANSFORMATIVE VISION?
A review of Becoming Dead Right. Frances Shani Parker. MI: Loving Healing Press (2007).
Frances Shani Parker has got to be not only one of the most caring, thoughtful women I have ever read about but also one of the smartest and most energetic.
A school principal who decided to take some courses in volunteer hospice training, Dr. Parker went right to work, turning her love for learning and her gift for problem solving into a gentle but powerful tornado. Given the chance to meet with hospice patients either in their homes or in the nursing home, she chose the nursing home because she "suspected terminally ill patients there might feel more isolated and because more medical personnel would be available if I need more immediate assistance (2007, p. 23).
Serving in a facility populated mostly by African Americans, with "a sprinkling of Caucasians and other races (2007, p. 27), Dr. Parker learned to deal with cultural differences as well as personal preferences of the patients, visitors, staff of the home and administrators. Using her gifts and experience as an educator and administrator, she observed, studied, analyzed, reconfigured the philosophy and practice of the hospice at which she volunteered but, most importantly, she listened to, validated and loved the patients she met, the families who visited, and the staff and other volunteers. In simply being who she is, she has helped others to be the best they could be, even in their dying.
In her book, Dr. Parker offers wonderful stories of the love and trust she elicited and the teamwork she engendered. But, along with possibilities, she also points out serious problems within the system and suggests very practical, cost effective and workable alternatives and adjunctive measures to help make the process of dying more peaceful and more dignified and, ironically, more cost effective.
Dr. Parker has done her homework and those who work in, volunteer in, or have a loved one living in a nursing facility or hospice will recognize themselves in this book, and will be offered a wonderful learning opportunity.
An additional gift is that they will have the privilege to meet a dynamic, caring, loving courageous woman who is changing the world gently but with great determination.
Another book which might be of interest and help to those who have loved ones or work with people who have been diagnosed with dementia is COULD IT BE DEMENTIA? Losing your mind doesn't mean losing your soul (Morse, Louise and Roger Hitchings. Monarch Books:Oxford UK and Grand Rapids, MI (2007). Their work introduces us to the church community of Pilgrim Homes, which, over 200 years ago, founded a ministry to care for elderly Christians, a ministry which has expanded in our century to include extensive research and loving caregiving for people with dementia.
Patricia M. Berliner, Ph.D.
NYS Licensed Psychologist
Reviewed on 08/03/2009 by ReviewTheBook.com Member Patricia Berliner
